"Ini ialah senarai 10 hadiah yang paling senang dan sesuai diberikan kepada
sesiapa sahaja yang kita kasihi ~
ibu, bapa, suami, isteri, saudara-mara,
anak dan sebagainya. Contoh di bawah ini lebih menjurus kepada hubungan
lelaki-wanita, sila ubahsuai jika ditujukan kepada orang lain. Pilihlah satu
atau pun semua.
1. Hadiah Mendengar:
Berikan hadiah ini kepada yang memerlukan, dan kamu hendaklah benar-benar
mendengar apa yang dikatakan. Jangan mencelah, jangan berangan-angan dan
jangan merancang bagaimana kamu hendak membalas.
2. Hadiah Tanda Kasih:
Jangan kedekut memberikan pelukan, ciuman dan ramasan tangan. Biarkan
tanda-tanda kecil ini tunjukkan kasih dan sayang yang ada di dalam diri
kamu.
3. Hadiah Sehelai Nota:
Ia mungkin ringkas seperti "Sayang Awak" atau sesuatu yang kreatif seperti
sebuah puisi. Letakkan nota-nota ini di tempat yang tidak disangka oleh
orang yang dikasihi.
4. Hadiah Ketawa:
Berikan sesuatu yang melucukan seperti gambar kartun atau artikel. Mesejnya
ialah, "Saya suka ketawa bersama awak."
5. Hadiah Puji-Pujian:
Sesuatu yang simple seperti "Warna biru memang ngam dengan awak" atau "Sedap
masakan awak" mempunyai nilai yang tinggi kepada orang yang mungkin merasa
dia
6. Hadiah Bantuan:
Tolong basuh pinggan mangkuk, buang sampah, jaga anak, dll.
7. Hadiah Bersendirian:
Ada ketika kita hanya mahu bersendiri. Peka kepada saat-saat itu dan berilah
masa dan ruang untuk dia bersendiri.
8. Hadiah Keceriaan:
Cuba sedaya upaya supaya kita sentiasa ceria apabila bersama orang-orang
yang dikasihi.
9. Hadiah Riadah:
Sertai sesuatu sukan/aktiviti yang disukai oleh orang yang dikasihi. Kalah
pun tak apa, kamu masih menang.
10. Hadiah Doa:
Selalu berdoa untuk kesejahteraan orang-orang yang dikasihi dan beritahu
mereka yang mereka setiasa berada di dalam doa kita. inilah hadiah yg paling
penting.. "
sama2 kita sampaikan benda y baik.....
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
jom kongsikn citer ni...
"Sepasang suami isteri - seperti pasangan lain di kota-kota besar
- meninggalkan anak-anak diasuh pembantu rumah semasa keluar bekerja. Anak tunggal pasangan ini, perempuan berusia tiga setengah tahun. Bersendirian dirumah dia kerap dibiarkan pembantunya yang sibuk bekerja bermain diluar, tetapi pintu pagar tetap dikunci. Bermainlah dia sama ada berbuai-buai di atas buaian yang dibeli bapanya, ataupun memetik bunga raya, bunga kertas dan lain-lain di
laman rumahnya. Suatu hari dia terjumpa sebatang paku karat. Dia pun melakar simen tempat letak kereta ayahnya tetapi kerana diperbuat daripada marmar,lakaran tidak kelihatan. Dicubanya pada kereta baru ayahnya.
Ya... kerana kereta itu bewarna gelap, lakarannya jelas.Apa lagi kanak-kanak ini pun melakarlah melahirkan kreativitinya. Hari itu bapa dan ibunya bermotosikal ketempat kerja kerana laluannya sesak sempena perayaan Thaipusam. Penuh sebelah kanan dia beredar ke sebelah kiri kereta. Dilakarnya gambar ibu dan ayahnya, gambarnya sendiri, lukisan ayam,kucing dan sebagainya mengikut imaginasinya. Kejadian itu langsung tak disedari si pembantu rumah. Pulang petang itu, terkejut badaklah pasangan itu melihat kereta yang baru setahun dibeli dengan bayaran ansuran, berbatik-batik. Si bapa yang belum pun masuk ke rumah terus menjerit, "Siapa punya kerja ni?" Pembantu rumah yang tersentak dengan jeritan itu berlari keluar.
Dia juga beristighfar. Mukanya merah padam ketakutan tambah-tambah melihat wajah bengis tuannya. Sekali lagi diajukan pertanyaan keras kepadanya, dia terus mengatakan "Tak tahu... !" "Duduk di rumah sepanjang hari tak tahu,
apa kau buat?" herdik si isteri lagi. Si aanak yang mendengar suara ayahnya, tiba-tiba berlari keluar dari bilik. Dengan penuh manja dia berkata "Ita buat ayahhh.. cantikkan!" katanya menerkam ayahnya ingin bermanja seperti selalu. Si ayah yang hilang sabar merentap ranting kecil pokok bunga raya di depannya,
terus dipukul bertalu-talu tapak tangan anaknya. Si anak yang tak
mengerti apa-apa terlolong-lolong kesakitan sekaligus ketakutan.Puas memukul tapak tangan, si ayah memukul pula belakang tangan anaknya. Si ibu ***a mendiamkan diri, mungkin setuju dan berasa puas dengan hukuman yang
dikenakan. Pembantu rumah melopong, tak tahu nak buat apa-apa. Si bapa cukup rakus memukul-mukul tangan kanan dan kemudian tangan kiri anaknya.
Selepas si bapa masuk ke rumah dituruti si ibu, pembantu rumah menggendong anak kecil itu, membawanya ke bilik. Dilihatnya tapak tangan dan belakang tangan si anak kecil calar balar. Pembantu rumah memandikan anak kecil itu. Sambil menyiram air sambil dia menangis. Anak kecil itupula terjerit-jerit menahan kepedihan sebaik calar-balar itu terkena air. Si pembantu rumahkemudian menidurkan anak kecil itu. Si bapa sengaja
membiarkan anak itu tidur bersama pembantu rumah. Keesokkan harinya, kedua-dua belah tangan si anak bengka Pembantu rumah mengadu. "Sapukan minyak gamat tu!" balas tuannya, bapa si anak. Pulang dari kerja, dia tidak melayan anak kecil itu yang menghabiskan masa di bilik pembantu. Si bapa konon mahu mengajar anaknya.Tigah hari
berlalu, ayah langsung tidak menjenguk anaknya sementara si ibujuga begitu tetapi setiap hari bertanya kepada pembantu rumah. "Ita demam... " jawap pembantunya ringkas. "Bagi minum panadol tu," balas si ibu. Sebelum si ibu
masuk bilik tidur dia menjenguk bilik pembantunya. Apabila dilihat anaknya
Ita dalam pelukan pembantu rumah, dia menutup semula pintu. Masuk hari keempat, pembantu rumah memberitahu tuannya bahawa suhu badan Ita terlalu panas. "Petang nanti kita bawa ke klinik. Pukul 5.00 siap" kata majikannya itu.
Sampai waktunya si anak yang longlai dibawa ke klinik. Doktor mengarahnya ia dirujuk ke hospital kerana keadaannya serius. Setelah seminggu di wad pediatrik doktor memanggil bapa dan ibu kanak-kanak itu. "Tiada pilihan.." katanya yang mencadangkan agar kedua-dua tangan kanak-kanak itu dipotong kerana gangren yang terjadi sedah terlalu teruk. "Ia sudah bernanah, demi nyawanya tangan perlu dipotong dari siku ke bawah" kata doktor.
Si bapa dan ibu bagaikan terkena halilintar mendengar kata-kata itu.Terasa diri tunggang terbalik, tapi apalah dapat dikatakan. Si ibu meraung merangkul sianak. Dengan berat hati dan lelehan air mata isterinya, si bapa terketar-ketar madandatangani surat kebenaran pembedahan. Keluar dari bilik pembedahan, selepas ubat bius yang dikenakan habis,si anak menangis kesakitan. Dia juga terpinga-pinga melihat kedua-dua tangannya berbalut putih. Direnung muka ayah dan ibunya. Kemudian ke wajah pembantu rumah. Dia mengerutkan dahi melihat mereka semua menangis.
Dalam seksaan menahan sakit, si anak yang keletah bersuara dalam linangan air mata. "Abah.. Mama... Ita tak buat lagi. Ita tak mau ayah pukul. Ita tak mau jahat. Ita sayang abah.. sayang mama." katanya berulang kali membuatka si ibu gagal menahan rasa. "Ita juga sayang Kak Narti.."katanya memandang wajah pembantu rumah, sekaligus membuatkan gadis dari Surabaya itu meraung seperti histeria. "Abah.. bagilah balik tangan Ita. Buat apa ambil.. Ita janji tak buat lagi! Ita nak makan macam mana? Nak main macam mana? Ita janji tak conteng kereta lagi," katanya bertalu-talu.Bagaikan gugur jantung si ibu mendengar kata-kata anaknya. Meraung dia sekuat hati namun takdir yang sudah terjadi, tiada manusia dapat menahannya.
*Sayang anak tangan-tangankan..(tapi jangan la sampai cam tu sekali nyek..) "
- meninggalkan anak-anak diasuh pembantu rumah semasa keluar bekerja. Anak tunggal pasangan ini, perempuan berusia tiga setengah tahun. Bersendirian dirumah dia kerap dibiarkan pembantunya yang sibuk bekerja bermain diluar, tetapi pintu pagar tetap dikunci. Bermainlah dia sama ada berbuai-buai di atas buaian yang dibeli bapanya, ataupun memetik bunga raya, bunga kertas dan lain-lain di
laman rumahnya. Suatu hari dia terjumpa sebatang paku karat. Dia pun melakar simen tempat letak kereta ayahnya tetapi kerana diperbuat daripada marmar,lakaran tidak kelihatan. Dicubanya pada kereta baru ayahnya.
Ya... kerana kereta itu bewarna gelap, lakarannya jelas.Apa lagi kanak-kanak ini pun melakarlah melahirkan kreativitinya. Hari itu bapa dan ibunya bermotosikal ketempat kerja kerana laluannya sesak sempena perayaan Thaipusam. Penuh sebelah kanan dia beredar ke sebelah kiri kereta. Dilakarnya gambar ibu dan ayahnya, gambarnya sendiri, lukisan ayam,kucing dan sebagainya mengikut imaginasinya. Kejadian itu langsung tak disedari si pembantu rumah. Pulang petang itu, terkejut badaklah pasangan itu melihat kereta yang baru setahun dibeli dengan bayaran ansuran, berbatik-batik. Si bapa yang belum pun masuk ke rumah terus menjerit, "Siapa punya kerja ni?" Pembantu rumah yang tersentak dengan jeritan itu berlari keluar.
Dia juga beristighfar. Mukanya merah padam ketakutan tambah-tambah melihat wajah bengis tuannya. Sekali lagi diajukan pertanyaan keras kepadanya, dia terus mengatakan "Tak tahu... !" "Duduk di rumah sepanjang hari tak tahu,
apa kau buat?" herdik si isteri lagi. Si aanak yang mendengar suara ayahnya, tiba-tiba berlari keluar dari bilik. Dengan penuh manja dia berkata "Ita buat ayahhh.. cantikkan!" katanya menerkam ayahnya ingin bermanja seperti selalu. Si ayah yang hilang sabar merentap ranting kecil pokok bunga raya di depannya,
terus dipukul bertalu-talu tapak tangan anaknya. Si anak yang tak
mengerti apa-apa terlolong-lolong kesakitan sekaligus ketakutan.Puas memukul tapak tangan, si ayah memukul pula belakang tangan anaknya. Si ibu ***a mendiamkan diri, mungkin setuju dan berasa puas dengan hukuman yang
dikenakan. Pembantu rumah melopong, tak tahu nak buat apa-apa. Si bapa cukup rakus memukul-mukul tangan kanan dan kemudian tangan kiri anaknya.
Selepas si bapa masuk ke rumah dituruti si ibu, pembantu rumah menggendong anak kecil itu, membawanya ke bilik. Dilihatnya tapak tangan dan belakang tangan si anak kecil calar balar. Pembantu rumah memandikan anak kecil itu. Sambil menyiram air sambil dia menangis. Anak kecil itupula terjerit-jerit menahan kepedihan sebaik calar-balar itu terkena air. Si pembantu rumahkemudian menidurkan anak kecil itu. Si bapa sengaja
membiarkan anak itu tidur bersama pembantu rumah. Keesokkan harinya, kedua-dua belah tangan si anak bengka Pembantu rumah mengadu. "Sapukan minyak gamat tu!" balas tuannya, bapa si anak. Pulang dari kerja, dia tidak melayan anak kecil itu yang menghabiskan masa di bilik pembantu. Si bapa konon mahu mengajar anaknya.Tigah hari
berlalu, ayah langsung tidak menjenguk anaknya sementara si ibujuga begitu tetapi setiap hari bertanya kepada pembantu rumah. "Ita demam... " jawap pembantunya ringkas. "Bagi minum panadol tu," balas si ibu. Sebelum si ibu
masuk bilik tidur dia menjenguk bilik pembantunya. Apabila dilihat anaknya
Ita dalam pelukan pembantu rumah, dia menutup semula pintu. Masuk hari keempat, pembantu rumah memberitahu tuannya bahawa suhu badan Ita terlalu panas. "Petang nanti kita bawa ke klinik. Pukul 5.00 siap" kata majikannya itu.
Sampai waktunya si anak yang longlai dibawa ke klinik. Doktor mengarahnya ia dirujuk ke hospital kerana keadaannya serius. Setelah seminggu di wad pediatrik doktor memanggil bapa dan ibu kanak-kanak itu. "Tiada pilihan.." katanya yang mencadangkan agar kedua-dua tangan kanak-kanak itu dipotong kerana gangren yang terjadi sedah terlalu teruk. "Ia sudah bernanah, demi nyawanya tangan perlu dipotong dari siku ke bawah" kata doktor.
Si bapa dan ibu bagaikan terkena halilintar mendengar kata-kata itu.Terasa diri tunggang terbalik, tapi apalah dapat dikatakan. Si ibu meraung merangkul sianak. Dengan berat hati dan lelehan air mata isterinya, si bapa terketar-ketar madandatangani surat kebenaran pembedahan. Keluar dari bilik pembedahan, selepas ubat bius yang dikenakan habis,si anak menangis kesakitan. Dia juga terpinga-pinga melihat kedua-dua tangannya berbalut putih. Direnung muka ayah dan ibunya. Kemudian ke wajah pembantu rumah. Dia mengerutkan dahi melihat mereka semua menangis.
Dalam seksaan menahan sakit, si anak yang keletah bersuara dalam linangan air mata. "Abah.. Mama... Ita tak buat lagi. Ita tak mau ayah pukul. Ita tak mau jahat. Ita sayang abah.. sayang mama." katanya berulang kali membuatka si ibu gagal menahan rasa. "Ita juga sayang Kak Narti.."katanya memandang wajah pembantu rumah, sekaligus membuatkan gadis dari Surabaya itu meraung seperti histeria. "Abah.. bagilah balik tangan Ita. Buat apa ambil.. Ita janji tak buat lagi! Ita nak makan macam mana? Nak main macam mana? Ita janji tak conteng kereta lagi," katanya bertalu-talu.Bagaikan gugur jantung si ibu mendengar kata-kata anaknya. Meraung dia sekuat hati namun takdir yang sudah terjadi, tiada manusia dapat menahannya.
*Sayang anak tangan-tangankan..(tapi jangan la sampai cam tu sekali nyek..) "
RamA-rAMa
Lihatlah rama-rama, ia cantik. Apabila pandangan
kita dihiasi rama-rama, kita menjadi suka dan
ceria. Hampir semua orang akan tersenyum
melihat rama-rama. Ia mengindahkan alam dan
menyempurnakan sekuntum bunga. Seindah mana
pun bunga tanpa rama-rama mahu hinggap di situ,
tentu ada sesuatu yang tidak kena.
Cubalah tangkap dan pegang rama-rama itu
dengan sayapnya. Lihat apa yang melekat di jari
anda warna dan corak rama-rama itu telah
berpindah ke jari-jari anda.
Kemudian lepaskan
kembali, ia terbang tapi lebih terbuai oleh angin.
Siapa pun yang akan menangkapnya kembali
tidak tertarik padanya lagi. Harganya telah tiada
untuk dikagumi, disimpan mahukan diawetkan.
Rama-rama ibarat wanita. Ia indah untuk dipegang
tetapi nilainya cepat turun setiap kali ada tangan-
tangan yang tidak wajar hinggap pada tubuhnya.
Memang fizikalnya tiada apa-apa yang kurang, tapi
harga diri dan maruah telah mula tercemar.
Begitulah wanita. Ia bagaikan rama-rama yang
terbang membawa corak-corak indah, apabila
corak-corak itu telah pudar ia tidak dipedulikan
lagi. Harga rama-rama terletak pada warna dan
coraknya; harga wanita terletak pada apakah
tubuhnya masih tulen tatkala dia didampingi oleh
suaminya.
Rama-rama terpaksa berjuang untuk memulakan
hidupnya. Dia terpaksa membebaskan diri
daripada kepompong. Bukan mudah untuk keluar
daripada kepompong yang mengikat itu.
Sedangkan sepanjang berada di dalam
kepompong tiada siapa pedulikannya, malah
tatkala bergelar ulat ia lebih dibenci.
Sulitnya untuk akhirnya bergelar rama-rama.
Terpaksa melalui kitaran dan evolusi bentuk.
Daripada sesuatu yang menjijikan akhirnya
bertukar menjadi sesuatu yang amat
menyenangkan. Rama-rama adalah contoh terbaik
wanita untuk sedar betapa bernilainya kehidupan
mereka. Sewaktu anda dipuja, usah terlalu mabuk
sebaliknya kenang-kenang kehidupan serba susah
sebelum itu. Sewaktu anda digoda, dihambat dan
dirayu usah terlalu mudah menyerah sebab
ingatlah mereka yang bersusah payah
memastikan anda dapat bangkit sebagai manusia
sempurna hari ini. Anda tidak muncul sendiri,
sebaliknya anda adalah lambang pengorbanan ibu
bapa.
Usah jadi rama-rama yang di dalam bingkai
gambar indah dipandang tetapi diri sendiri
menanggung beban. Hiduplah dengan bebas dan
terjemahkan kebebasan itu kepada nilai-nilai murni
yang perlu dipertahankan. Hak anda ialah
memelihara kehormatan. Selama mana anda
memelihara kehormatan dan maruah diri anda
berada pada taraf A1, sebaik sahaja anda tidak
peduli kepada siapa maruah itu hendak diberikan,
anda sudah kehilangan masa depan.
Kalaulah rama-rama tahu dia cantik dan sentiasa
memukau penglihatan manusia, dia tentu tidak
mudah-mudah terbang ke sana sini. Sebab setiap
kali ia mengibarkan sayapnya, ia sentiasa
terdedah pada bahaya. Namun rama-rama tidak
pernah tahu dia itu indah dan sentiasa menjadi
sasaran manusia. Jika anda tidak pernah tahu
kewanitaan anda itu adalah sasaran terpenting
sang penceroboh, anda ibarat rama-rama yang
tidak sedar diintai bahaya.
Mahalkan harga diri anda. Semakin sukar anda
dimiliki semakin mahal nilai anda di sisi lelaki.
Lelaki perosak hanya inginkan kuasa memiliki
tetapi tidak mahu setia apalagi memelihara dan
melindungi anda.
Usah terperangkap ke dalam tangan yang hanya
akan meleraikan warna-warna anda. Setelah warna-
warna itu hilang anda dibiarkan. Jadilah wanita
angun yang punya nilai dan maruah diri, anda akan
lebih dihormati.
Nilai anda bukan terletak pada berapa ramai lelaki
yang ingin memiliki anda tetapi berapa ramai yang
benar-benar sanggup menyintai anda. Cinta itu
terjemahan pada kasih sayang dan belaian sayang
penuh ikhlas. Selama mana anda belum
menemuinya anggaplah diri anda masih berhak
terbang bebas bagaikan sang rama-rama.
Jadilah rama-rama yang mengindahkan alam,
jadilah wanita yang membanggakan semua orang.
kita dihiasi rama-rama, kita menjadi suka dan
ceria. Hampir semua orang akan tersenyum
melihat rama-rama. Ia mengindahkan alam dan
menyempurnakan sekuntum bunga. Seindah mana
pun bunga tanpa rama-rama mahu hinggap di situ,
tentu ada sesuatu yang tidak kena.
Cubalah tangkap dan pegang rama-rama itu
dengan sayapnya. Lihat apa yang melekat di jari
anda warna dan corak rama-rama itu telah
berpindah ke jari-jari anda.
Kemudian lepaskan
kembali, ia terbang tapi lebih terbuai oleh angin.
Siapa pun yang akan menangkapnya kembali
tidak tertarik padanya lagi. Harganya telah tiada
untuk dikagumi, disimpan mahukan diawetkan.
Rama-rama ibarat wanita. Ia indah untuk dipegang
tetapi nilainya cepat turun setiap kali ada tangan-
tangan yang tidak wajar hinggap pada tubuhnya.
Memang fizikalnya tiada apa-apa yang kurang, tapi
harga diri dan maruah telah mula tercemar.
Begitulah wanita. Ia bagaikan rama-rama yang
terbang membawa corak-corak indah, apabila
corak-corak itu telah pudar ia tidak dipedulikan
lagi. Harga rama-rama terletak pada warna dan
coraknya; harga wanita terletak pada apakah
tubuhnya masih tulen tatkala dia didampingi oleh
suaminya.
Rama-rama terpaksa berjuang untuk memulakan
hidupnya. Dia terpaksa membebaskan diri
daripada kepompong. Bukan mudah untuk keluar
daripada kepompong yang mengikat itu.
Sedangkan sepanjang berada di dalam
kepompong tiada siapa pedulikannya, malah
tatkala bergelar ulat ia lebih dibenci.
Sulitnya untuk akhirnya bergelar rama-rama.
Terpaksa melalui kitaran dan evolusi bentuk.
Daripada sesuatu yang menjijikan akhirnya
bertukar menjadi sesuatu yang amat
menyenangkan. Rama-rama adalah contoh terbaik
wanita untuk sedar betapa bernilainya kehidupan
mereka. Sewaktu anda dipuja, usah terlalu mabuk
sebaliknya kenang-kenang kehidupan serba susah
sebelum itu. Sewaktu anda digoda, dihambat dan
dirayu usah terlalu mudah menyerah sebab
ingatlah mereka yang bersusah payah
memastikan anda dapat bangkit sebagai manusia
sempurna hari ini. Anda tidak muncul sendiri,
sebaliknya anda adalah lambang pengorbanan ibu
bapa.
Usah jadi rama-rama yang di dalam bingkai
gambar indah dipandang tetapi diri sendiri
menanggung beban. Hiduplah dengan bebas dan
terjemahkan kebebasan itu kepada nilai-nilai murni
yang perlu dipertahankan. Hak anda ialah
memelihara kehormatan. Selama mana anda
memelihara kehormatan dan maruah diri anda
berada pada taraf A1, sebaik sahaja anda tidak
peduli kepada siapa maruah itu hendak diberikan,
anda sudah kehilangan masa depan.
Kalaulah rama-rama tahu dia cantik dan sentiasa
memukau penglihatan manusia, dia tentu tidak
mudah-mudah terbang ke sana sini. Sebab setiap
kali ia mengibarkan sayapnya, ia sentiasa
terdedah pada bahaya. Namun rama-rama tidak
pernah tahu dia itu indah dan sentiasa menjadi
sasaran manusia. Jika anda tidak pernah tahu
kewanitaan anda itu adalah sasaran terpenting
sang penceroboh, anda ibarat rama-rama yang
tidak sedar diintai bahaya.
Mahalkan harga diri anda. Semakin sukar anda
dimiliki semakin mahal nilai anda di sisi lelaki.
Lelaki perosak hanya inginkan kuasa memiliki
tetapi tidak mahu setia apalagi memelihara dan
melindungi anda.
Usah terperangkap ke dalam tangan yang hanya
akan meleraikan warna-warna anda. Setelah warna-
warna itu hilang anda dibiarkan. Jadilah wanita
angun yang punya nilai dan maruah diri, anda akan
lebih dihormati.
Nilai anda bukan terletak pada berapa ramai lelaki
yang ingin memiliki anda tetapi berapa ramai yang
benar-benar sanggup menyintai anda. Cinta itu
terjemahan pada kasih sayang dan belaian sayang
penuh ikhlas. Selama mana anda belum
menemuinya anggaplah diri anda masih berhak
terbang bebas bagaikan sang rama-rama.
Jadilah rama-rama yang mengindahkan alam,
jadilah wanita yang membanggakan semua orang.
PERSONALITY OF TRANSSEXUAL STUDENT.
Dr Hamdan Abdul Kader bagi kami 1 assigment yang agak mencabar ketika 1st semester di UTM bagi subjek Seminar Kaunseling Di Tempat Kerja. Yang menariknya, Saya belajar banyak benda daripada assigment yang beliau beri... selain artikel, kami perlu membuat monograf juga. 1st time saya buat monograf. Alhamdulillah, saya dapat A dalam subjek ni :) Ok, jom kongsikan bersama. Monolog saya akan kongsikan kemudian, inshaAllah..
PERSONALITY OF TRANSSEXUAL STUDENT
IN UTM, SKUDAI
Ayesha Binti Abdul Mannan
Master Student
Faculty of Management and Human Resourse Development
Universiti Teknologi Malaysia
ABSTRACT
The research is a descriptive in nature to identify the relationship between transsexual student and the personality among student in Universiti Teknologi Malaysia, Skudai. The data was collected from 125 respondents who are cross dresser student in UTM. The data collected by using a set of questionnaire. The cross dresser students have to fulfil the questionnaire. The data was analysed using SPSS version 10.0. The findings of this study were the cross dresser group score highly on ESFJ and ESFP for personality test. There is some suggestion to prevent transsexual among UTM student.
1.0 INTRODUCTION
Transsexuals can be define as who want to belong to the opposite sex, and transvestites, who only "cross-dress" in their clothes, sometimes live, quite unrecognized, as members of the sex or gender that is not theirs organically. In these cases, the psychological sex determines the social sex, which otherwise follows the sex of assignment at birth, and the sex of rearing in childhood, both based on the anatomical (and legal) sex. These are normally the kinds of sex in which a person dresses and finds his or her place in the world.
The transsexual male or female is deeply unhappy as a member of the sex (or gender) to which he or she was assigned by the anatomical structure of the body, particularly the genitals. To avoid misunderstanding: this has nothing to do with hermaphroditism. The transsexual is physically normal (although occasionally underdeveloped). These persons can somewhat appease their unhappiness by dressing in the clothes of the opposite sex, that is to say, by cross-dressing, and they are, therefore, transvestites too. But while "dressing" would satisfy the true transvestite, it is only incidental and not more than a partial or temporary help to the transsexual. True transsexuals feel that they belong to the other sex, they want to be and function as members of the opposite sex, not only to appear as such. For them, their sex organs, the primary (testes) as well as the secondary (penis and others) are disgusting deformities that must be changed by the surgeon’s knife. This attitude appears to be the chief differential diagnostic point between the two syndromes (sets of symptoms) - that is, those of transvestism and transsexualism.
The word personality have many insight, and most of the insight can be divided in two categories. The first personality insight is refer to social adeptness. One’s personality is being valued by looking the way they success to get positive responds from other people in many situation. Second insight is refer to personality as a impression that’s given by someone about their self to other people. Pengertian kedua merujuk kepada personaliti sebagai kesan yang diberikan oleh seseorang tentang dirinya kepada orang lain. By these insight, we can conclude that personality is refer to any estimation toward someone. (Habibah dan Noran Fauziah, 2002).
In this research, personality is measured by Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) personality test. This test was modified to make sure it suitable with this research. MBTI is a personality inventory report which was design for giving people information about Jungian psikological type. MBTI more extrude basic personality inventory than outward appearance dimension (Myers, 1985). Based on this theory, individual outward appearance is influence by one out of four alternative type given that is:
1. How somebody get in touch with – Extrovert (E) atau Introvert (I)
2. How somebody view information– Sensing (S) atau iNtuition (N)
3. How somebody make decision– Thinking (T) atau Feeling (F)
4. Somebody life style – Judging (J) atau Perceiving (P)
According to Myers (1985), these four type of dimension also can be combine to view someone personality. This combine compose sixteen type of clearly personality which is the most accepted personality types module by the public nowadays. All types have its own characterization where it ca be identify in individual personality. There also have parallel and different between the personality types. Combination among four types of characterization that is Extrovert (E) or Introvert (I), Sensing (S) or iNtuitive (N), Thinking (T) or Feeling (F) and Judging (J) or Perceiving (P) produce sixteen types of personality which is ISTJ, ISTP, ESTP, ESTJ, ISFJ, ISFP, ESFP, ESFJ, INFJ, INFP, ENFP, ENFJ, INTJ, INTP, ENTP dan ENTJ.
1.1 INTROVERTED SENSING THINKING JUDGING (ISTJ) – Duty consummation
Serious and quiet, interested in security and peaceful living. Extremely thorough, responsible, and dependable. Well-developed powers of concentration. Usually interested in supporting and promoting traditions and establishments. Well-organized and hard working, they work steadily towards identified goals. They can usually accomplish any task once they have set their mind to it.
1.2 INTROVERTED SENSING THINKING (ISTP) – Mechanic
Quiet and reserved, interested in how and why things work. Excellent skills with mechanical things. Risk-takers who they live for the moment. Usually interested in and talented at extreme sports. Uncomplicated in their desires. Loyal to their peers and to their internal value systems, but not overly concerned with respecting laws and rules if they get in the way of getting something done. Detached and analytical, they excel at finding solutions to practical problems.
1.3 INTROVERTED SENSING FEELING JUDGING (ISFJ) – Nurse
Quiet, kind, and conscientious. Can be depended on to follow through. Usually puts the needs of others above their own needs. Stable and practical, they value security and traditions. Well-developed sense of space and function. Rich inner world of observations about people. Extremely perceptive of other's feelings. Interested in serving others.
1.4 INTROVERTED SENSING FEELING PERCEIVING (ISFP) – Artist
Quiet, serious, sensitive and kind. Do not like conflict, and not likely to do things which may generate conflict. Loyal and faithful. Extremely well-developed senses, and aesthetic appreciation for beauty. Not interested in leading or controlling others. Flexible and open-minded. Likely to be original and creative. Enjoy the present moment.
1.5 INTROVERTED INTUITIVE FEELING JUDGING (INFJ) – Protector
Quietly forceful, original, and sensitive. Tend to stick to things until they are done. Extremely intuitive about people, and concerned for their feelings. Well-developed value systems which they strictly adhere to. Well-respected for their perserverence in doing the right thing. Likely to be individualistic, rather than leading or following.
1.6 INTROVERTED INTUITIVE FEELING PERCEIVING (INFP) – Idealisme
Quiet, reflective, and idealistic. Interested in serving humanity. Well-developed value system, which they strive to live in accordance with. Extremely loyal. Adaptable and laid-back unless a strongly-held value is threatened. Usually talented writers. Mentally quick, and able to see possibilities. Interested in understanding and helping people.
1.7 INTROVERTED INTUITIVE THINKING JUDGING (INTJ) – Scientist
Independent, original, analytical, and determined. Have an exceptional ability to turn theories into solid plans of action. Highly value knowledge, competence, and structure. Driven to derive meaning from their visions. Long-range thinkers. Have very high standards for their performance, and the performance of others. Natural leaders, but will follow if they trust existing leaders.
1.8 INTROVERTED INTUITIVE THINKING PERCEIVING (INTP) – Thinker
Logical, original, creative thinkers. Can become very excited about theories and ideas. Exceptionally capable and driven to turn theories into clear understandings. Highly value knowledge, competence and logic. Quiet and reserved, hard to get to know well. Individualistic, having no interest in leading or following others.
1.9 EXTROVERTED SENSING THINKING PERCEIVING (ESTP) – Performer
Friendly, adaptable, action-oriented. "Doers" who are focused on immediate results. Living in the here-and-now, they're risk-takers who live fast-paced lifestyles. Impatient with long explanations. Extremely loyal to their peers, but not usually respectful of laws and rules if they get in the way of getting things done. Great people skills.
1.10 EXTRAVERTED SENSING THINKING JUDGING (ESTJ) – Custodian
Practical, traditional, and organized. Likely to be athletic. Not interested in theory or abstraction unless they see the practical application. Have clear visions of the way things should be. Loyal and hard-working. Like to be in charge. Exceptionally capable in organizing and running activities. "Good citizens" who value security and peaceful living.
1.11 EXTROVERTED SENSING FEELING PERCEIVING (ESFP) – Practitioner
People-oriented and fun-loving, they make things more fun for others by their enjoyment. Living for the moment, they love new experiences. They dislike theory and impersonal analysis. Interested in serving others. Likely to be the center of attention in social situations. Well-developed common sense and practical ability.
1.12 EXTROVERTED SENSING FEELING JUDGING (ESFJ) – Give protection
Warm-hearted, popular, and conscientious. Tend to put the needs of others over their own needs. Feel strong sense of responsibility and duty. Value traditions and security. Interested in serving others. Need positive reinforcement to feel good about themselves. Well-developed sense of space and function.
1.13 EXTROVERTED INTUITIVE FEELING PERCEIVING (ENFP) – Inspirer
Enthusiastic, idealistic, and creative. Able to do almost anything that interests them. Great people skills. Need to live life in accordance with their inner values. Excited by new ideas, but bored with details. Open-minded and flexible, with a broad range of interests and abilities.
1.14 EXTROVERTED INTUITIVE FEELING JUDGING (ENFJ) – Giver
Popular and sensitive, with outstanding people skills. Externally focused, with real concern for how others think and feel. Usually dislike being alone. They see everything from the human angle, and dislike impersonal analysis. Very effective at managing people issues, and leading group discussions. Interested in serving others, and probably place the needs of others over their own needs.
1.15 EXTROVERTED INTUITIVE THINKING PERCEIVING (ENTP) –Vision booster
Creative, resourceful, and intellectually quick. Good at a broad range of things. Enjoy debating issues, and may be into "one-up-manship". They get very excited about new ideas and projects, but may neglect the more routine aspects of life. Generally outspoken and assertive. They enjoy people and are stimulating company. Excellent ability to understand concepts and apply logic to find solutions.
1.16 EXTROVERTED INTUITIVE THINKING JUDGING (ENTJ) – Executive
Assertive and outspoken - they are driven to lead. Excellent ability to understand difficult organizational problems and create solid solutions. Intelligent and well-informed, they usually excel at public speaking. They value knowledge and competence, and usually have little patience with inefficiency or disorganization.
2.0 PROBLEM STATEMENT
Cross dresser phenomena in IPTA was discussed in IPTA deputy vice cancelor meeting in 1996 and 1997. In that meeting, discussion find they are more cross dresser student in general university (Rajmah 2003, Utusan Online).
The cross dresser student occur some issue related to acceptance by the campus society and also how these cross dresser student accept the society. Transsexuality phenomena among students always bring negative response between normal student and student administration staff. Do personality and life style of cross dresser students influence normal student and give negative illustration to university? Or campus society its own askew view toward cross dresser student and make them feel isolated and also make them can’t build social association with others friend. Therefore, this research will find the answer for some of the research problem such as:
i. How is personality among cross dresser students?
ii. How cross dresser students give negative image to Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM)?
iii. How to dike transsexual phenomena in Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM)?
3.0 OBJECTIVE
There are some ojektive to fulfil this research. The objective is :
i. Know the personality of cross dresser student..
ii. Know the effort that can be operate to dike cross dresser symptom among
Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM) student.
4.0 METHODOLOGY
4.1 SAMPELING DESIGN
The sampling frame and sampling size are very important to achieve the research objective. Also the suitable sampling design and size are very important to collect and analysis the effective data. For the purpose of this research the sampling design and size were adapted with the research. The respondents for this study were the cross dresser student of Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM).
In this research, the data was collected by using questionnaire. A set of questionnaire was developing based on the information that we need from the respondent. This research involves data collection process, analysis and reschedules data, interperformance and summarizes the finding.
This research was held in Universiti Teknologi Malaysia from all faculties at UTM Skudai campus. Respondent for this research was 125 cross dresser student. The data was from two source which is primer data and secunder data.
4.2 POPULATION AND SAMPLE
Populations for this research consist cross dresser student in Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM). Respondent for this research was 125 cross dresser student. The respondent was selected from all faculties in UTM by random sampling.
4.3 INSTRUMENT
This research utilizes the quantitative research methodology. The instrument used to collect the data is questionnaire. The researcher organizes the questionnaire. The set of questionnaire contain four parts. The first part is about the personal information, then followed by second part which is about personality inventory, after that the third part is for life style, then the fourth part is about self-esteem.
We will focus in part B, which is about personality inventory. Items in this part were developing by using Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) personality test. This part contains 32 items to measure four types of personality which is:
a) Introvert ( I ) – Extrovert ( E )
b) Sensing (S ) – iNtuitive ( N )
c) Thinking ( T ) – Feeling ( F )
d) Judging ( J ) – Perceiving ( P )
4.4 DATA ANALYSIS
The data was analysed using Statistical Package for Social Science (SPSS version 10.0). For analysed information about respondent demography and personality, frequency distribution method and percentage was used. The data for this research was collected by giving the questionnaire to respondent and collect back the questionnaire in few minutes.
5.0 FINDINGS
Table 5.1: Item sowing and skor calculation for personality types.
Table 5.1 : Item sowing and skor calculation for personality types
Item for Introvert | Item for Extrovert | Item for Sensing | Item for Intuitive |
2a | 2b | 1b | 1a |
6a | 6b | 10b | 10a |
11a | 11b | 13a | 13b |
15b | 15a | 16a | 16b |
19b | 19a | 17a | 17b |
22a | 22b | 21a | 21b |
27b | 27a | 28b | 28a |
32b | 32a | 30b | 30a |
I or E personality type S or N personality type
(If skor for I or E is same, (If skor for I or E is same,
not including question 11) not including question 16)
Item for Thinking | Item for Feeling | Item for Judging | Item for Perceiving |
3a | 3b | 4a | 4b |
5a | 5b | 7a | 7b |
12a | 12b | 8b | 8a |
14b | 14a | 9a | 9b |
20a | 20b | 18b | 18a |
24b | 24a | 23b | 23a |
25a | 25b | 26a | 26b |
29b | 29a | 31a | 31b |
T or F personality type J or P personality type
(If skor for T or F is same, (If skor for J or P is same,
not including question 24) not including question 23)
Source : Marcic, et.al (2001)
5.1 PERSONALITY TYPE
Determination about cross dresser student personality was done based on personality score which was gain by analysis 32 personality items. Combination of four types of characterization which is Extrovert (E) or Introvert (I), Sensing (S) or iNtuitive (N), Thinking (T) or Feeling (F) and Judging (J) or Perceiving (P) will produse 16 personality such as ISTJ, ISTP, ESTP, ESTJ, ISFJ, ISFP, ESFJ, ESFP, INFJ, INFP, ENFJ, ENFP, INTJ, INTP, ENTJ and ENTP. The highest skor for all four characterizations shows one’s personality.
Table 5.2 shows cross dresser students distribution frequency and score percentage for all types of personality. From this research, ESFJ (Giving protection) personality type get the highest percentage which is 21.6% (27 students). Followed by ESFP (Practitioner) personality type that is 18.4% (23 students). Then, followed by ENFJ (Giver) and INFJ (Protector) personality type that is 8.8% (11 students) each. While, 8.0 % (10 students) have ENFP (Inspirer) personality type.
Table 5.2: Cross dresser personality type frequency and percentage
Personality type | Frequency | Percentage |
ESFJ (Giving protection) | 27 | 21.6 |
ESFP (Practitioner) | 23 | 18.4 |
ENFJ (Giver) | 11 | 8.8 |
INFJ (Protector) | 11 | 8.8 |
ENFP (Inspirer) | 10 | 8.0 |
ENTP (Vision booster) | 9 | 7.2 |
INTJ (Scientist) | 7 | 5.6 |
ISFJ (Nurse) | 6 | 4.8 |
ENTJ (Exsecutive) | 5 | 4.0 |
ESTJ (Custodian) | 4 | 3.2 |
ISFP (Artist) | 4 | 3.2 |
ISTJ (Duty consummation) | 3 | 2.4 |
INFP (Idealisme) | 2 | 1.6 |
ISTP (Mechanic) | 2 | 1.6 |
INTP (Thinker) | 1 | 0.8 |
ESTP (Performer) | 0 | 0 |
TOTAL | 125 | 100 |
5.2 PERSONALITY CHARACTERISTIC
Outcome from cross dresser student personality characteristic analysis shows that 21.6% cross dresser student have ESFJ personaliy type which can be classify as giving protection. Individual who have ESFJ personality interested in social activity. They use sensing and judging characteristic to gain specific information about other people. They are very responsible and can be trusted. They are also friendly and energetic. They will satisfy from others happiness and always hope for acknowledgement for what they have done. With extraverted feeling which dominate personality, ESFJ likes to ‘read’ others mind. Normally, they have goog idea about implementation and doesn’t afraid to give their opinions. As a conclusion, cross dresser students with ESFJ personality is a individual who likes to make new friends, co-operate with others, like social activities, sympathy to others, helping each other and clever.
Cross dresser student who have ESFP personality is classify as practitioner. Individual with this personality also likes social activities and new experience. They have a strong interpersonal finesse and always playing role as a peacemaker. As they make decisions with their own personal values, they are usually very compassionate, be of equal feeling, sensitive to problems of others and try to find a good way with their needs. This group has an unpretentious attitude and like enjoyable. If they do not build this aspect of thinking by giving consideration to the rational thought process, they too will follow on the appetite, so enjoy ourselves to the self-satisfaction more than the duties and responsibilities are often forgotten as students. They will shrug off this idea of taking long-term consequences of their acts. In addition, they become like the object of power and implement something for other people. They think life is social encounters that need them always play a role as a lawyer.
The next personality of cross dresser student is the ENFJ which can be classify as a giver. This groups have a strong interpersonal mastery. They understand and take care about others they also can pick outothers talented and ability. They always understand, show their love and sincere against other people. They always want close relationships between individuals,can be trusted and loyal. Thus, they will try to realize and perpetuate the relationship to one another.
INFJ personality is also owned by cross dresser students where they are more as protectors. Individuals with this type are gentle, difficult to understand, artistic and creative. They placed the high belief on the feeling, that make them accentuate instinct their self. This makes them stubborn and ignore others opinions. They always thought that they are correct and perfect. This produces a conflict between them and others. However, they are friendly to anybody who are close to them. They tried to keep feelings of other people not to harm them. They are sensitive to conflict and can not face it.
The next personality type is ENFP which can be classify as inspirer. ENFP personality type of individual is the person who took intimate, vibrant and full of potential. They live in a world full of possibilities and desire in achieving something. The spirit of wonder and inspiration allow them to motivate others. They behave friendly and interested to build interpersonal relationships with others. They have ability to understand someone through their intuition after know that person in limited time. As a conclusion, they are interesting group, risk taker, and sensitive oriented individuals. They have the ability to fulfill their wish.
Based on the personality characteristics that have been discussed, we found that the most of the respondents is in extrovert (E) character. They like to interact with other people and love outside world. They also like to involved actively in activities and feel enjoyable when dealing with other people. Thus, they have many acquaintances. As a conclusion, the individual with extrovert personality love social activity, be intimate, have a high-interpersonal finesse and is very loyal to the group.
6.0 SUGGESTION
Efforts to repress the development of cross dresser student culture at UTM, Skudai needs to be done as soon as possible to make sure this phenomenon does not spread to become more serious in future. Verily, there are some alternative suggested that is expected to help administer of the university as a continuation of the action this phenomenon.
1. Existence attitude reengineering program.
2. Edit university counseling system.
3. On-line counseling.
4. One stop center in each college.
5. Counsellor be placed in each faculty.
6. Course peer program adviser.
7. Obligatory them to join military practice.
8. Program consulting parents to cross dresser students.
9. Serious attention from faculty administrator.
10. All male students are required to wear neck tie.
1. Existence attitude reengineering program.
2. Edit university counseling system.
3. On-line counseling.
4. One stop center in each college.
5. Counsellor be placed in each faculty.
6. Course peer program adviser.
7. Obligatory them to join military practice.
8. Program consulting parents to cross dresser students.
9. Serious attention from faculty administrator.
10. All male students are required to wear neck tie.
7.0 CONCLUSION
Study that may have been executed identifies some factors that are associated with the life of the cross dresser students. Not only in terms of the number of students involved, we also can identifies their personality. The results obtained explains to us that the campus transsexual students indeed have the characteristics as the outside transsexual person.
Transsexual phenomena hesitation all people if this symptom didn’t dike from beginning. The life style of transsexual is irrelevant from the real life style of the normal human. The sense of love and like the same gender gives negative response and hesitating if the symptom going on. This disavowal must be dike as soon as possible before it spread to other social disease. Society must rally and co-operate to help transsexual man return to normal life.
Existence of transsexual students in UTM campus will provide negative implications toward university image as a brilliance and science education center. Although the number of students involved in this phenomenon is small, but its still hesitation if the amount will increase year by year. As we know, university received a big number of students every year. It is not impossible if among the new students, there are transsexual students or students who tend to have feminize characteristics. So, in this case the university regulation should be carried out. Firm and fair actions needs to be carried out against any student who violates the rules set by the university including the dress ethics among student reinforcing that was fixed by the administrator.
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